I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You made out with two different species that night
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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