And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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