it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
