When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
