Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
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dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
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Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.