my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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