my text book just quoted the cookie monster
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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