Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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