it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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