I showed him my bush... on skype.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
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