In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
