need another drink. this is the easiest way
My first STD was from a foam party
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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