Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Randomize
