I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
We left the knife in your bed.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
