i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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