Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
