CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
