Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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