D3 body, D1 cock
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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