his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
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Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
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I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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