whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
