would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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