She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
