I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
