I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No subtext here. People are naked.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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