Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help