The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
