I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
