ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
