i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
