I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
