My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
