i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
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i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize