His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
