next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize