Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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