I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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