Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
i need some magic done to my vagina
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