did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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