he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob