I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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