2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Randomize
