If that was your dad, he is hot
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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