It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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