UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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