U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
We have so much sex to catch up on
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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