Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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