I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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