biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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