i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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