She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
